A bit of background
For those of you who do not know me, I am Vixen Lee, Submissive of (Master) James Lee. This post is about my first time camming for him. We agreed upon and entered a D/s contract in June of 2020. Our dynamic can seem a little odd in some regards and typical in others. I am in the US and he in Ireland, though I can’t say we are an online D/s couple. The reason for that is Master James feels saying online implies I only belong to him while we are in contact via any app or web source. I am his Submissive 24/7, therefore I would say we are simply in a long-distance D/s dynamic.
I am incredibly open as to who I am and many of my concerns over D/s. One being that, due to past trauma, I have extreme poor image issues. Anything that reflects my image is an enemy of mine. I don’t have mirrors throughout the house, I take very few photos (and even that is recent), I never before recorded myself or cammed for Master James. He decided to help me in becoming a Submissive and train me all before even knowing how I looked. Our contract does have a clause that states he has the right to request photos or that I cam.
This is part of our trust building, as I am trusting him with my greatest fear, and he gains my trust by not asking for more than I can give. I have since begun to send photos randomly, not all nudes or naughty, but of my day and where I am. About 2 weeks ago I sent him a video disrobing so he could finally see more of me and that was so scary, but I did find having control of pressing record and sending it helped in providing me with the push and courage I needed.
So how did I end up actually camming?
After having sent him the short video of me disrobing, we were working out the details of our new contract and he asked if I would agree to cam for him. He asked me if I would submit to him fully on this and follow his orders. I am not sure what came over me but all I could say was, “Yes Master James”. We did discuss it more and he did assure me that I would have my safeword and he would also stop it, should he see I became too distressed over the experience. He is always good about making sure I am safe and well cared for and I could never thank him enough for how he treats me.
How could I not attempt to cam for him? He is so good to me, and he came to love me before ever seeing who I was. My mind and submission, those are what he values most. He always made it clear that all Submissives are beautiful and should be valued but not because of their physical appearance. He said it was because of how a Submissive gives themselves, willingly, to another. Their mind and their submission were priceless and should be cherished. So again, I ask, “How could I not say yes”? On July 4th we agreed upon our new contract and on July 10th a chance to make this all a reality presented itself. My husband and children were to go to Dallas and stay for the night leaving me home alone Saturday.
I immediately messaged Master James asking him what his work schedule looked like and if he thought we could find time Saturday to attempt me camming and playing for him. We agreed that at midnight my time Saturday night would work well for us both. We spoke about it throughout the week, and he made sure to remind me not to worry, as it could be stopped at any point. We discussed possibilities and options for playing and what toys I was to have available. I was okay with not knowing all the exact details but having my options set before hand brought tranquility as I had an idea as to what might be asked of me.
Setting the scene
Saturday arrived and it was just after 3pm my time and he asked how I was and what I was thinking. I told him I was a bit scared and nervous, but I was still okay to go forward with it all. He asked me what I was wearing, and I happened to be naked at the time (I tend to be naked when home alone). He said, “I will call you now”. WHAT? It wasn’t even remotely near midnight, and I was not fully prepared but the words that came out were, “Yes Sir”. My phone rang and I answered it with my camera uncovered (I normally keep black tape over my camera). He could see me naked and without makeup.
It was me, fully bare to him, in my simplest of forms. Nothing to hide behind. And what does he say? “You are gorgeous. Why did I let you hide from me for so long?”. He is a bit of a romantic, but we will keep that between us. I was so scared, but I did not focus on my image but his face and voice. He begun instantly asking me to place my hands behind my back while I kneeled for him. Then, he had me stand and turn for is viewing of my entire body. I was told to place my hands behind my back and spread my legs apart while he took it all in. What did I feel? I am not fully sure. It was as if it wasn’t me doing these things.
All I can say is he gave instructions and my mind and body only sought to follow through with all he wanted. I needed to do these things for my Master and for me and my submission. He then had me kneel again and I did play for my Master and his pleasure. When we were done with our session, he said he would call me at midnight. This was an opportunity that arose, and he wanted to help me break the ice. I have to say, I think it helped that it was sudden and not planned as I did not have time to over think it all and freeze up.
Camming for real
I went on with my day and chatted before seeing the time and deciding I should set up where I would cam from later that night and showered. I did wear a leather belt attached to these leather ties that wrapped around my thighs and a white t-shirt. This time I did take time to put on a bit of makeup and tie my hair up. Suddenly my phones dings while I am getting all my toys out and ready and I think, is it midnight already? No, it is 11pm and my Master is calling because he could no longer wait. Isn’t he just so lovable?
He says, “Hi”. We chat for a bit, and I teased how he had to wait till midnight, and he asked if I was serious. I said I was ready if he wanted to call, and he didn’t hesitate in calling me. This time was a little easier and he asked if I was happy. I said I was. He did surprise me by asking for pegs and candles that were not on the list but I was happy to provide them, as I keep all these items readily available at all times. I moved over to show him that my fucking machine (sorry I don’t know what else to call it) was set up for our use and the dildo attachment available and ready.
Once again, I was lost in his voice and commands and simply began to submit to all he wanted. It was beautiful doing these acts and seeing his enjoyment of it all. This time he rewarded me as well. I was allowed to view him taking pleasure from viewing me. I couldn’t have been more grateful to my Master for this. There we were, both of us completely exposed to the other. I thought I had grown as close to my Master as I could ever be but this experience broke down a wall and our intimacy grew so much more in intensity.
Overcoming limits and personal growth
I wanted to share this with you all to show that a hard limit is to always be respected but never doubt your ability to over-come it. With the help and care of a good Dom/me, you can be pushed hard or gradually to go beyond points you never thought possible. I am so lucky to have been gifted by the universe with a Master who is kind and patient yet firm and consistent. He is my Master and I his Submissive. I submit fully to him, and he proudly owns me. I will find joy in every day we have in our D/s dynamic.
Thank you, Master James, for all you provide for me and how well you protect and cherish both me and my submission. I am yours…xx
To read more about my submissive journey, why not check out my blog – Vixen Lee 3
Featured Image by Alexandr Ivanov from Pixabay