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  • Adra and Profile picture of elsklingelskling are now friends 3 days, 1 hour ago

  • Hi RM,

    It has been great getting to know you this past while. I have loved having you on the chat to share your thoughts and I love your blog too.

    Thanks for adding your intro.

    missy x

  • Hi Aussie Girl,

    It was lovely to meet  you and chat today. I hope that you find it helpful here in terms of learning. And I am so glad that you took the plunge and asked for a D/s lifestyle dynamic. How exciting.

    missy x

  • Hi FlameMarked,

    Lovely to meet  you. I hope that  you will find some people who you can relate to here and who will share their own experience as that is a great way to learn. Please just shout if you have any questions.

    Missy x

  • Hi L2B,

    Thank you for adding your intro and encouraging others. 43 years experience – WOW. I looke forward to learning from you.

    missy x

  • This is the place to come if you want to introduce yourself and say hello to others.

    Please start a new topic thread with your details and/or have a read of others and leave a reply for them.

    If you are looking for a particular group then this might also be a good place to signal that. So for example the topic could be ‘Calling all subs from…[Read more]

  • I agree with LoveToBeCruel, this is your dynamic so it is about what you want to get from it. Read and research and take the bits you like the sound of and leave the rest – there is no wrong way to do this so find a way that works for you so forget those who preach the one true way. When thinking about goals and rules and rituals we found it b…[Read more]

  • Missy started the topic Hello from Missy in the forum INTRODUCTIONS 1 week, 1 day ago

    Hello. My name is missy. I am a submissive married to HisLordship. We live in Scotland in the UK and have lots of children who are mostly grown up now. We started D/s back in 2012 when I asked HL if he would be my Dom. He agreed and yay – here we still are. We started with bedroom only but it was a bit off and on and hard to sustain so in 2014 we…[Read more]

  • Rope play is the topic for Tell Me About this week and I realised we didn’t have a post about it on our blog so wanted to put something together. What I have done is to try to collect some resources by way of […]

  • The second post contains the following reflective questions:

    1. What things help to access your Dominant or submissive mindset?
    • Mental
    • Emotional
    • Sexual or physical
    1. What things help to maintain your Dominant or submissive mindset?
    • Mental
    • Emotional
    • Sexual or physical
    1. What are the barriers to accessing and…

    [Read more]

  • This post is part of our Dom sub workbook and involves using focus questions to look more closely at Dominant submissive mindset. Mindset, accessing and maintaining it, was one of the areas that came up following […]

  • A mindset is a set of beliefs which affects how you think, feel and behave. People refer to having a fixed mindset where you can often be set in your opinions, or a growth mindset where you are more open to […]

  • Hi Ellen, these sound like good things to work on. Did you want me to try to think of something to incorporate them or was it more that you would be focussing on these. I am happy to chat over this at any point. missy x

  • Hi Ellen. Thank you so much for joining in. I look forward to hearing how it goes. I think that this first task should be a good overview but I have come up with lots that I want to work on. I am happy to create tasks which respond to the things that others want to focus on too as I am pretty much creating this as I go. Thanks, missy x

  • When I started the task, I actually had much more detail than I expected. My plan was to post my thoughts on my blog as well as showing them to HL so I have split it into three parts, using the headings as breaks.

    Here is part 1: Submissive Traits and Qualities

  • The first post covers three areas and contains the following reflective questions:

    What sort of Dominant or submissive are you?
    1. What are your Dominant or submissive traits and qualities?
    2. What are the traits and qualities you have which can be a barrier to being Dominant or submissive?

    What do you want from Dominance or submission?
    3. What…[Read more]

  • The Dom Sub Workbook will be a set of posts which contain questions designed to help you to reflect on your Dominance or submission.

    Really you should use it in any way that you want. You can follow the tasks and do them all in order, or you can dip in and out. You can post about your progress and share your thoughts in the forums, or on a blog…[Read more]

  • So welcome to the New Year and with that comes the thought of what we want to get from it in a variety of ways. For HL and I this involves thinking about personal goals and achievements but also ones for the site […]

    • I will be adding this to my D/s resources!

      • Ooo thanks Brigit. I am not sure how it will go or how often I will add to it. I am trying to do this one now and realise that it is really long so I will break it down into three parts for posting I think. The good news is that I have lots of positive qualities. I have told HL he is a lucky man lol. Missy x

    • Thats really great Missy. Very logical and thoughtful. Always good to reflect upon yourself & acknowledge changes x

    • This is great! I would have loved this when I was just getting started. I might try to play with it now even. Have you thought about making it an actual workbook? Like with Canva or something similar?

      • I think I might put it together when I am done, yes. I will see how it goes and thought I would try it out here first. I look forward to reading if you give it a go. Missy x

    • Great resource and I will try and find the time to think through how I see myself and write my characteristics and goals

      • No pressure to use it PS but I thought I would share anyway. I hope you find it helpful if you do use it. Missy x

    • I love this missy! I’m wondering if you’d be offended if I wrote a few posts around this concept and linked them back to this page? I think this is very valuable info that could help lifestylers of all types. I also think it could help my journey too 🙂

      • Hi Mrs K. I wrote it because HL and I were going to do it but shared it in case anyone else would find it helpful so I would be really interested if you did it too. I am also keen for any feedback so that I can improve the tasks to fit others. If you link it back that is great – I made the badge so that people could do that if they wanted to blog their answers. I also started a forum which you probably saw. Missy x

    • Missy, you have done a wonderful job creating this. I have often chatted with new Doms and Subs and have advised that they seek what interests them and who they are before seeking someone to be their partner. You have taken that and broken it down in a manner that will simplify it for everyone. I am in an online relationship and I find I still have so much to learn. I will take this and break it down for myself. I am lucky to have found someone who is caring, patient and understanding but can push me all at the same time. Thank you Missy for all you do…VL

      • Thank you so much Vixen. I am glad that you found it helpful but if there are changes needed when you use it then please let me know and I can adapt it as I would like it to be flexible if possible and fit other people too. Missy x

  • Time to bring out my homemade festive nipple clamps I think.

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