So I’m a sub and I have been dating a wonderful guy, but he’s totally vanilla. I love him so much, but I can tell he’s uncomfortable with the whole D/s dynamic. I can feel my sex drive plumeting and I’ve found myself fantasizing about my ex Dom. It doesn’t help that he (my ex Dom) wants me back. My bf says he is willing to try, but I can see how uncomfortable it makes him when I call him “Sir” or “Alpha” and we usually stop there. Advice is appriciated.
I second what DW4Sir said. Communication is the key to every good relationship. My husband was uncomfortable at first because he was raised by a strong feminist and it seemed like D/s made me less than him. But we talked about it and he took the time to learn about it. I am just as valued as he is in our relationship, I choose to give him power over me.
If your bf isn’t comfortable with Sir or Alpha maybe there is a different honorific that you could use like Boss or Chief or something else he’s okay with.
And as it has been said it might not be his thing.