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    • #950

      When I say slave I mean a BDSM slave of course where they consent to everything that happens.How I define a slave and M/s relationships is as follows. Slaves do not get limits or safewords, they don’t get a say unless they are granted that privilege. Everything is agreed upon before the M/s relationship starts. The slave is given one safeword which when said ends the entire relationship, there are no in-betweens. The slave is property to the Master and can be treated as such i.e. they can be sold, traded, borrowed, damaged, given away etc. not legally anyway but there are seen as just another thing the Master owns like his car for example.

      That sounds harsh, i’m a slave and that sounds harsh to me lol. That is why trust is needed in a relationship like this or any power exchange relationship for that matter. We follow the above definition so I don’t have limits but yes, they are some things I really don’t want to do and he knows as we’ve discussed it and some things he still does and some he doesn’t. I have no safeword except if we’re trying a new thing and he lets me use one for the first few times. If he doesn’t grant me a safeword I can use it if and only if something serious has happened and he doesn’t stop it himself and even then he can overrule my safeword if he thinks it isn’t that serious of an issue. If I ever abuse it, it would be taken away from me, The safeword I have that ends the entire relationship exists but it’s been adjusted since we have kids and got married. Why? The safeword ends the entire relationship the power exchange part and the vanilla part so I can’t say that safeword and still be his girlfriend after. This is the no in-betweens part, either we have a relationship with BDSM and kink or we have none at all. That safeword has a new meaning now since being married means it’s more complicated now to just end our relationship and we have kids so we have to think about them too. Master can have another person in his life and it wouldn’t be considered cheating, people can have two of the same “things” after all. He can lend me to other people, trade me for another slave, break me or whatever he wants however, he hasn’t or at least he hasn’t yet lol. It takes a lot of trust to give someone that kind of power over you and not be sure what they’ll do with it.

      So what do I get from this? Happiness. Like other subs and slaves, I want to please him and try my best to do so. When he is happy then I am happy too! He owns all of me and everything I have so he controls everything. That means I don’t have to think, I just have to follow what he says when he says and how. Slaves are not mindless however it may seem that way since for me at least, I don’t even think about what he tells me to do, I just do it. It took time of course but it’s such a nice feeling. Ironically, there’s a sense of freedom in it. It is freeing. People have a concept that people in Master/slave dynamics are super strict, are always high protocol and we don’t laugh or joke with each other. Well we do because behind the titles and the roles and the capitalized letters we are all still human. We can’t be high protocol all the time either, we still have to function and get things done.

      I like being a slave and prefer it over being a sub. Neither dynamic is better than the other,just different. A slave means something different from a sub and slavery means something different from submission. In slavery, people think you don’t have a say/voice/opinions/rights and to some extent its true for me. M/s can vary just like D/s. Everyone’s D/s is different, everyone’s M/s is different. Its what you make it. M/s doesn’t always mean strict as D/s can be strict too. Masters don’t have to be strict/oppressing to be “true” Masters. I can ask to have a say in something but it’s up to him to allow it or not rather than subs who are entitled to this, for me it’s a privilege.

      My slavery is calming to me and we both get something that we want from it else we wouldn’t keep doing it lol. I’m not sure what he gets from it but it quiets my mind because of the lack of control over everything. The strictness of the dynamic is something I need in order to want to behave and it comforts me. There is a lot of intimacy created in situations where it is enforced that I have absolutely no power as it is a bit scary when you think about M/s (from my definition of it). My slavery is warm and special and there is strength in it, it empowers me and that is wonderful!

    • #954

      Thank you Emily for explaining your dynamic; I certainly learnt a few things!  I think what is clear is that every dynamic is different, as is every relationship with people we know. Be human, as you say, allows laughter and intimate interaction regardless of any title you may carry.

    • #956

      It does, no bootcamp in our house lol

      That’s how I define slavery but it might be different for other people hence my slavery. Maybe someone does have limits and is a slave, lucky them and their freedom! lol

    • #1357

      Thank you Emily for sharing. I am glad you are happy in your relationship. I understand how nice it is by having a free mind. Since entering  a D/s relationship I feel the same way.

      • #1362

        That is great LO!

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