I am excited to be a part of this community and to have the opportunity to discuss some of these things with others in similiar situations. I am fairly new to being a submissive, my last relationship was formed on the platform of being a dom/sub relationship. However, it turned out my “dom” was just an abusive, controlling boyfriend. He started out with small things, and eventually, 3 years in, ended up just beating the shit out of me.
Anyway, I finally removed myself from the situation. But I didn’t want to turn away from learning about being a submissive. I have always wanted to do it correctly, and continue to educate myself to try not to be put in that situation again.
A friend of mine (14+ years) and I have discussed a dom/sub relationship, we have intimately discussed a relationship (many times over the years), and recently he has started to ask me what I think about giving it a try. I want to, and I am more comfortable getting involved with someone I am close with. But I also don’t know if I am fully ready for it. I still flinch away from people who are just trying to hand me things, how am I supposed to submit comfortably?
It sounds like you still have trust issues, with very good reason. Trust is something that can only come with time and lots of communication. Only you can say if you are ready to try again. You and your friend could start slowly with small things. Let him know if and when you are uncomfortable in a situation. He need to respect your limits. As the sub the overall control lies with you, what you are willing to do or not do. If you want to pursue this have a nice long talk him, negotiate the terms of the relationship. You can always change your mind and adjust things as you go.