Complete newbie

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    • #12564
      Jacquisub
      Participant

      Hi all, I’m new to all this so hope you can all bare with me, I’m married and have been looking into further spicing up our sex life, I’ve always loved my other half taking the lead telling me what he wants we’re he likes me what he wants me to do and even being on the rough side but I’m finding it’s not enough for me  I’m finding my sexual desires are massively heightened and it’s making my husband miserable because instead of Me feeling satisfied when he’s done I’m left unsatisfied reeling and wanting more feeling like something was definitely missing when we’re done having sex feeling hornier than when we started I’m craving more! More sex more of his time more roughness and after reading and looking into things I think I want him to dominate me but it’s something we have never actively done I just would like to know we’re do we start where do I need to be looking for what he can do is there more books information anything that could help us get started on this Dom/sub journey

    • #12568
      Missy
      Keymaster

      Hello – lovely to meet you Jacquisub,

      I think that lots of us feel that way to begin with. It sounds like you might be experiencing a bit of subfrenzy. You might find this post Patience and sub-frenzy is helpful and if not then try searching. It will likely take your partner longer to catch up to the point you are at and that adjustment time can be hard. It can be helpful to keep reassuring him about how much you are enjoying it and how much he is getting right. It has to move at a pace that works for both of you even though that is frustrating. I think for the D it can be hard to plan and make sure that everything is in place and he will build his confidence over time. I hope this helps but feel free to keep asking.

      missy x

      • #13212
        Adra
        Participant

        I understand. My husband/daddydom found the book The Loving Dominant very helpful As he is not by nature a domineering person.  We are in month 6 of our Ds journey and it definitely takes time and experiment and above all communication… we talk about our Ds dynamic 2-3x a week and we review our contract monthly because so much changes as we explore what is working and not working. We settled into the DD/bg dynamic by accident about a month ago and it just clicked as a more natural and organic dynamic for us and daddy just really got INTO being a dom after that!! It finally felt RIGHT for him.

        read as much of missy’s website (submissy) as possible. It has been soooo helpful to me. Also the podcast Loving BDSM with Kayla Lords and her husband-dom-daddy John Brownstone has been very enlightening  for both my Daddydom and me as they discuss every possible Ds issue you can imagine and do it with humor and grace!  Hope that helps! Im hoping to spend more time here talking with others as i am finding greater need to create community for myself.

    • #27581
      Alister Fraser
      Participant

      Hi Jaquisub. A sexologist said once that 70% of people of both sexes are happier as subs than doms.  Would you like to ty an experiment?  Develop your allure, and tempt him, seduce him into a gentle, devotion, obedience and  submissiveness for a change on a night of your choice.   It may not come natural at first, but adding to your repertoire may be the answer for both of you.

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