Am I wasting my time?

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      Hi there and im looking for some opinions on a current situation. Ive been with someone for 8 and a half years. I have explained what I am to her and in full detail. I am an ABDL that has been one for my entire life. I lived through a dominant home life with a bullied school life. Those things as well as a natural want to a submissive. I have a Sissy side of being an ABDL and want to be forced into both positions. After explaining the bondage side, the being dominated over, the want to please a dom, to have orders written, etc. After every conversation we had about everthing, she said she would help me. Now i started explaining this early on and took about 1 and a half years to bring out piece by piece to help each thing process. Ever conversation there was an option to opt out of the relationship if it got too much. Each time was agreed upon that she would help. My ABDL side of me isnt some I get into casually, its apart of me and who I am. Its a stress reliever and plenty more benefits to my over all health. At this point there has been several conversations about the wants we both want in life. She wants children and I want to be the child who serves a mommy in a way she sees fit. This alone is is the biggest problem. With the lack of her keeping her word over all this time, Am I wasting my time staing and being stressed out all the time or do I invest my self into working on a current interest? Please any constructive feed back would ve mlst appreciated. thanks

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