Elust 105 Header Mrs Fever

Photo courtesy of Mrs Fever

Welcome to Elust 105

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #106 Start with the rules, come back May 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

I lost my sexuality for a year.

Stolen Penis

Bright English Mornings

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Flavour of Femme

She Teaches Sex Ed!

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Katy

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

 

Erotic Fiction

Game On
Rites of Passage Training – Sensual Details.
More than Friend’s: Chloe’s video
Molly: The First
Your Canvas
Sometimes I talk too much
His Dirty Rhythm
In case you didn’t get fucked last night.
Gossamer
Cataclysm
The Girl in Fishnets

Erotic Non-Fiction

Let’s Play a Game
Abandoning the Sofa
Smacked around a bit
Fuck You [Redacted]

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Meet The Desperate Eye Of Censorship
The Catastrophe of Ageing

Body Talk and Sexual Health

What it’s like to model nude for art classes
Tip Your Artists

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Life… grief, depression and disability
Living with Chronic Lyme Disease
Welcome

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

The edge of glory
F/m Reader Q&A (audio with full transcript)
Teasing & Torment
Guest Post: Interview with Violet Fawkes

Events

A landmark event for MPB – Public Play

Poetry

-07.04.18_13:49-

 

 

Elust

 

Inside EroticonA few of my fellow bloggers have asked me to write about my experience at Eroticon, ‘a weekend of learning, socialising and fun for sex bloggers, erotica writers and erotic creatives’. I had never really considered myself to be in any of these categories so I was a little worried that I wouldn’t fit in but I was made welcome from the outset. I think a lot of other people there had shared the same self doubts at some point and this was alluded to in the keynote speech given by Girl on the Net. She empathised with my anxiety but encouraged, “your words can change the world.” After a swift and humorous account of the year, she arrived at the conclusion that, “We can’t all do everything but everyone can do something.”  In between she made me think, and I mean really think, about my place in this world and what I can do.

 

The Seminars

During the weekend we attended a number of different seminars and I have to say that I learnt something in each one and came away thinking a little bit differently. We chose a blend of talks which made us think about both the content of our blogs and site as well as the technical side of reaching your audience.  The talk on taboos by Remittance Girl, as well as Annabelle Knight’stalk on erotic writing made me think not just about writing fiction but also about the sorts of challenges that we face as writers of sex and erotica. They picked up on some of the points raised in the opening address and allowed me to feel that I was part of the collective whole.

 

I have always thought that although I can write, I don’t have good imaginative ideas, but listening to these people speak and the suggestions contributed by the audience was bringing my ideas to the fore. This continued during the workshop by Cressida Downing about whether there is a book in your blog. I am not sure the answer to that would be yes, but listening to the questions she asked and the advice she gave made me realise that there probably were ways that I could spin off from what I do here if that was something I wanted to try. It was also great to hear those listening to the talk offering suggestions and ideas and that really was something that was indicative of the whole ethos of the event.

 

Kayla Lords session really set things in a different direction as she talked about how to monetise your blog without selling your soul. This is something that I have never really thought about doing but she made me see that you can do it in a way which doesn’t have to change the content or even necessarily take money from your readers. It can be much more about how to find ways of making your blog work for you through things such as reviews and affiliates. I guess this tied in a little with discussion around the marketing of sex products in the talk given on the adult industry by Nina Saini, which again, had me thinking about things in a way that I never had before.

 

Having recently moved into posting some photographs on my site, the workshop given by Molly about editing was extremely helpful. Again it made me think about the content of what is on my blog but also about the technical side and I learnt about good tools for editing as well as some of the rules of photography that I hadn’t known about. The tips and hints on sizing of images and the cataloguing them were also things that I had known nothing of before so that was a huge help.  Please note, Molly, that my ‘Sinful Sunday’ pictures will no longer be, “the size of a planet.”

 

Michael Knight’s workshop on SEO and fetish.com’s talk on raising your visibility on google were so helpful to HisLordship and myself. Setting up The SafeworD/s Club has left us somewhat floundering in the world of site building, maintenance and repair. While we have the basic skills, neither of us is close enough to computer geekery required to run such a thing successfully, and we have not yet ‘come out’ to our 15 year old son who may actually be able to help. So blindly through the back door of the internet we have crept and are grateful at what was demystified for us over the weekend. In terms of content and technical wizardry we still have a long long way to come but Eroticon left us feeling a little bit wiser and a little bit more aware of the potential that was out there for us to improve.

 

The People

Wow. This part of the weekend was huge. Eroticon is a community and one which is inclusive and welcoming. Overall I was struck but the willingness to share with others without no personal gain other than feeling good talking about a shared interest and love. I suppose because most people are coming at it from the angle of writing being a hobby and a passion it allows for a different, more supportive and non-threatening feel. These people are not just friendly, they have actually become friends over the years and the buzz that creates is infectious. The energy, the enthusiasm and the positivity was palpable and that really helped to make the event for me.

 

It wasn’t just the organisers and participants who were part of this, the sponsors were also people who were passionate about their products and couldn’t wait to share that, and their expertise, with anyone who was interested enough to listen. I have been at other events before where it is a commercial thing but this was much more about sharing their belief in a product that they have a personal connection to. There was never a feeling that it was about money, although many of those attending were trying to make a living, or even just cover off some of their costs; it felt much more like a community celebrating in each other’s success, encouraging and sharing ideas and helping one another to move forward in a very collaborative way.

 

I suppose that really the whole event came full circle for me so that from the beginning where the seed was sown that we all had a part to play, to the end where I felt what that part might be for me on a personal level, there was the feeling that I would not be alone. I was part of a community looking to change things for the better, slowly but surely, piece by piece. This event was so good that I posted the day after about the sub-drop I felt following it. Since then I have so many ideas and projects whirring around my head that I feel as if I am back in the sub-frenzy phase.

 

Obviously a huge part for me was spending time with HisLordship as a couple, doing something that we are both interested in and love. Being away alone together was a real treat and to meet so many fascinating, talented and knowledgeable people was a huge bonus. Although the seminars we attended were amazing, I heard so many positive things of the ones which ran in tandem to them that I could have filled my time two or three times over, which probably answers the question, would you attend again? You bet I would. The weekend was not a budget one but it was one which was hugely valuable and I would happily spend that in order to take part again. Two early bird tickets for next year please!

 

Post originally posted on submissy

When we set up the site we wanted to host the topic chats, which are always well supported, but we also wanted to have a place for members to come and chat about other aspects of D/s with like-minded people. In order for the open chat to work on a new site we thought that having two designated days would mean that people would be less likely to miss each other as they would know when they could come on. As the site has grown, there have often been people here chatting informally at a number of other times which means that the Thursdays and Sundays are no longer necessarily any busier than at other times of the week.

 

We also had open chats initially which were sub and Dom only, but people seemed to want to chat together, so we have found that those rooms became used less and less. Recently some members have said that although the mixed chat is valuable, it would also be good to have some chat which is either geared more for Doms or more for subs. So we have decided to have set topics for discussion on a Thursday from 8pm. This will be pretty flexible and can run at any time really for those in another time zone but that is when HL and I will aim to be on. 

 

Topics for this week are as follows:

Doms discussion: Communication during a scene and its value.

subs discussion: Something I never thought that I would do.

 

We will post the discussion topics on the calendar but have also set up an area in the forums where people can add ideas and suggestions for the Dom discussions, the sub discussions and also the mixed topic chats. We are also keen to hear from anyone who is willing to host a chat on a particular topic. Please don’t feel that you need to be an ‘expert’ for this as we are all learning. The role of the host is much more to facilitate the discussion by asking the odd question and keeping things on track. 

 

The Thursday evening chats at Eastern Standard Time will run in their present format until the end of March when Emily will start her maternity leave; we are pleased to announce that slars and Lars have kindly come forward to step into the breach as is were, so that the topic chats can continue. In addition, Princess has also very kindly agreed to host the Little chat and party so thank you also to her.

 

We would also like to welcome the new members who have been able to join us since our sign-up glitch which lasted far too long, and of course to thank our other members for their continued support during our various IT trials and tribulations. Hopefully March will be a good month; the calendar is now full and we look forward to seeing you at one of the chats.

 

Best wishes,

HisLordship and missy

As 2017 draws to a close, we wanted to thank you all very much for your continued support with The SafeworD/s Club. It was always our intention that this should be a community which was defined by the members and you have all helped in establishing a place which is welcoming, inclusive and supportive. It has been brilliant to see such a diverse group who have been willing to give up their own time, experience and knowledge to become involved and share with others. 

We are pleased to announce the arrival of our brand new SWC Book Group. Please CLICK HERE to join the group and then we will keep you up-to-date via email about what is going on.

 

Details of book chats and discussion threads can be found on OUR FORUM where you can also get involved by joining the discussion threads, sharing your thoughts and making suggestions.

 

The first chat will be a WELCOME CHAT which will take place this Sunday, DECEMBER 3, from 9:00 pm – 10:00 pm GMT.  The chat this time will really be an introduction to what our brand new book group is going to involve. So please come along and join Miriam, slars, and cc in THE LIBRARY to say hello and find out how it is all going to work. 

 

For more information about the book group, please see the group admins, Miriam, littleloveslars and cc.

Tomorrow is World Metal Health day so I wanted to take a minute just to raise awareness for that.  At work we are wearing a ‘touch of yellow’ in order to highlight this as there are growing numbers of young people in schools who are managing with mental health issues.  Since joining the wonderful world of Domination and submission I have made loads of amazing friends but I have been surprised by the numbers of those who are managing, or who have managed, mental health issues of some sort. Clearly I do not believe that there is a link between D/s and mental health issues, quite the opposite in fact.  In reality a large number of the people who I have spoken to actually feel that the D/s has helped them to manage their difficulties in a positive way. Continue reading “Hello Yellow”

According to the internet, a community is a place where people come together to share a common interest.   That I suppose, could be the problem with D/s for new people; they search for some hidden meaning or secret handshake.  I too waited for some bolt of lightening that would make me understand what I was supposed to be doing.  In fact, it is actually far more simple, for being in a D/s relationship is about being more aware of others and how your actions effect them.  I appreciate each dynamic is very different, however, being part of a community does help. I was once accused by another Dom of looking for validation as if it was a dirty word.  I would say that a small part of being in a community is getting some form of validation. How many places can you go and ask about someone’s new job and in the next breath enquire if their new butt plug was a success? Continue reading “Community”

Just over two months ago, HisLordship and I opened the virtual doors of The SafeworD/s Club.  The idea behind the site was to provide a safe and friendly place for Dominants and submissives to come along, meet others, and chat. Our thinking was that we wanted to be able to provide somewhere for people to share their experience and also learn from each other. We have always appreciated the support that we have had from the friends we have made on this journey and on a selfish level we wanted to build on that, as well as offering the same to others. Continue reading “And next, here comes the Blog”

Based on a conversation in the Main Lounge the other night, we have added a new forum. It is meant to be a bit of fun where you start a thread based on whether or not you think someone is a Dom, a sub, or a switch. So far there is a ‘Game of Thrones’ topic but feel free to add others. 

Dom, sub or switch….?

Thank you also to everyone who has contributed to the forums already. They are slowly starting to fill up so please read what others have written, reply and add new topics. 

As an addition to the calendar for this week, we would like to let you know about a second Dom and sub topic chat. Due to the fact that most of our chats take place at a UK time, we wanted to offer something for those of you who are across the pond and may not be able to make the earlier time on a Tuesday. Hopefully some of you will be able to attend both!

The TOPIC for the chat this week will be PRIMAL PLAY and it will take place on WEDNESDAY from 8pm-9pm EDT in THE DUNGEON.

Do you enjoy raw, animalistic play? Do you love a struggle or enjoy things such as biting, scraping or wrestling? Whether you are an experienced primal player or just interested to know more, please come along and join EMILY for a topic chat on Primal Play and share your ideas, thoughts and experience.