Codependency and D/s

In psychological terms codependency refers to a relationship which is unhealthy. While, as an English teacher I want to say that the prefix co means jointly and dependent means needing the support of someone, we cannot get away from the fact that language has evolved to establish a meaning in more general terms. So for […]

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pain

Tell Me About … Pain

For the majority of people who are into BDSM, pain and pleasure seem to walk hand in hand. How you feel and the way that you experience each will vary greatly from person to person and will be dependent on a variety of other factors, but there is usually a close relationship between the two. […]

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training your submissive wife

Training as a submissive wife

Training is a term often thrown around in the world of Dominance and submission, but to find out what it actually means and involves can be quite hard. As with everything, training means different things to different people and this post reflects an interpretation of it which comes from within a married dynamic. I say […]

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rituals

Rituals: the why the how and the what

Why we have rituals For most D/s couples, rituals are quite an important part of what they do. Although they are often the small things, an action, a word, a deed, they can help to keep the right mindset for both of you. They do this by reinforcing the power exchange and essentially highlighting the […]

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beginner's guide to roleplay

A Beginner’s Guide to Roleplay

Roleplay within a BDSM context can be exciting for some and daunting for others, so we thought it would be a good idea to put together some ideas which could form a bit of a beginner’s guide to roleplay. Roleplay is when you act out or perform the part of a person or character.  In […]

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Accessories and Mindset - image from Bijoux Indescrits

Accessories and Mindset

The theme for our topic chat this week is accessories and mindset. This really goes further than just thinking about what we wear as part of play, to tapping in to how accessories can make us feel. Sometimes certain things will bring with them a particular memory and trigger a feeling based on how they […]

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tell me about vulnerability - being vulnerable

Tell Me About …

The SafeworD/s Club is proud to present ….. our newest project, ‘Tell Me About … Dominance and submission“. First we had the chat, then we had the forums, the we had the blog and NOW we have a writing prompt! Ok so why start a writing prompt? There are lots of amazing writing prompts and […]

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The Queen Bee – Review by submissy

The Queen Bee by Hot Octopuss describes itself as ‘a powerful next-generation clitoral stimulator’. As those of you who read my blog regularly will know, clit stimulation is really my thing, so I was keen to try out a toy which claimed it could provide ‘a unique and intense experience’. I sometimes feel a bit […]

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Surviving the Holidays

  We thought that it would be a good idea to do a collaborative post for this topic as everyone manages things a little differently. So here goes for our top tips:     PurpleSole Christmas day will be at my in-laws so here are some fun tips for maintaining the dynamic when in the […]

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give and take - gift wrapped present

Life is a game of give and take

Our theme this week is ‘festive fun’ so it seemed to make sense to think about giving. There is a huge focus on giving during the festive period and it is also a key part of any D/s relationship – giving is for life not just for Christmas as they say and that certainly works […]

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Being a middle

I have lots of friends who identify as being little and are in DD/lg type dynamics. I had always thought that wasn’t me so it came as a shock when I finally realised that actually it was. I think it took me so long to work out because I wasn’t very interested in the things […]

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Spanking it up at the SWC

As the focus for this week is spanking, we thought it would be good to get a bit of an insight into what some of us like about spanking, how we use it, and how it adds to our dynamic. Personally I have written a lot on my own blog about the topic and this […]

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Needle Play – the Ins and the Outs

Needle play is something that often falls under the category of Edge Play, meaning that it comes at the edges of what many would view as safe and in indeed sane. This, of course, is subjective but it is a kink that can carry risks and therefore requires some good research before attempting to try […]

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With a Crescendo

Mystery Vibe cite the Crescendo as “The World’s Most Advanced Luxury Vibrator” and I would have to say that I think there is a lot of truth to that claim. It is one of the most versatile vibrators that I have ever seen. Everything about it is adaptable from the shape to the settings to the […]

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Warm Up and Cool Down

Our theme this week is warming up and cooling down so I wanted to focus on how this works within a D/s play relationship. These thoughts are based on my own experience so should be taken as suggestions only, as different things will work for different people. However, in my opinion, just like with exercise, […]

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Forced Orgasm Scene

The first proper scene the we did when we started D/s was a forced orgasm scene and it remains one of the easiest ways for me to reach subspace. To get to that point would probably be between 4 and 6 separate orgasms but with rolling ones in between. * * * * * * […]

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