This topic contains 3 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Beth [MM] 2 months, 3 weeks ago.

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  • #4146

    Mr. D
    Participant

    Hello all,

    its been awhile since LittleOne and I have been on or posted so I thought I would share some of what we have been up to and my latest endeavor.

    We have been very active in the fet community, meeting good people and going to events. One of the couples that LittleOne and I have gotten to know during our rope nights were talking about being a “switch” I found the idea very interesting. Though as to my self I have always been a Dom. and never considered being or trying to be a switch. But I made the decision to try, I want to try and experience “sub space”

    we have had two sessions now where I was the bottom I couldn’t get myself in the right frame of mind, I kept trying to take charge. Also it’s not in LittleOnes nature to be a top and using a flogger and other instruments is a little bit difficult for her. We were talking that if she was unable to flog or take charge to get me where I needed to be that I would have another Dom try.

    im wondering if any other Doms. out there have tried to become a switch and if so give some advice that may help.

    or it might be that’s its just not possible for me.

    Thanks all

    Mr. D

     

  • #4212

    HisLordship
    Keymaster

    Hi Mr.D,

    You pose an interest question!  Although we don’t switch, I have allowed Missy to try new toys out on me first.  This does allow me time to understand the feeling of the toy and how I need to control it. This does require me to let go and enjoy the experience, however, I often regain control one again.

    There is one other scenario that borders close to your situation and that is sensation play. When we have swapped around for this I like to be restrained. In honesty we have only done this twice and it does need me to be restrained so that Missy is given the chance to play out her plan.  It does change the dynamic slightly but only in terms of who has the cuffs on!  Remember that it was me that said she could do it!  So in summary, get tied up, blindfolded and if your are vocal, get gagged, however, that’s not one for me!

    Good luck!

  • #4213

    Mr. D
    Participant

    HL Thank you for the post and suggestion,

    I’m thinking that the main problem with myself and sub space is at least at this point is that it’s something I want, but not what I need. What I mean is my needs have always been as Dom/Top. Which means that the inability to be a bottom or get to sub space is because of my mental state (I’m the one holding myself back), I’m considering trying meditation before another scene where I’m the bottom.

    another interesting observation is what I’m feeling during my time as bottom. The feelings I get are complete opposite, Top/bottom. As we are moving through the scene I find that impact play it feels good, but I’m constantly wanting more and higher levels of pain to see if I can get to subspace.

    Where going to a party in a couple of weeks, I may try another partner to see if there is different results.

    ill post what happens if that happens

    Thank you

    Mr. D

     

     

  • #4416

    Beth [MM]
    Participant

    You can have some one service top you, you still get to be Dom and in charge but also on the receiving end of the play.

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